Greetings and Salutations

Disclaimer: I initially wrote this post pre-COVID-19. Hopefully one day we can get back to enjoying the greetings and salutations you are about to read about. Until then, stay safe and keep your social distance.  🙂

Kindness can be shown in so many different ways. Though I know it is not necessarily common in other parts of the country, in Texas as a young boy, we are taught to hold doors open for females. Not to show that we are somehow superior or that we think that they are weak and cannot possibly open a door by themselves. We are taught this because it is a kind gesture and a sign of respect for others. To take that even a step further, why not just hold doors open for everyone? It is often a nice surprise to others when you perform this seemingly simple gesture. Do this without expecting a thank you in return.

Yet another way to show others kindness is to greet others with a handshake or a hug. I know, I know. Human contact weirds some people out. I have to confess: I am a hugger. Which is really strange because I don’t necessarily like to be touched by other people. I typically only hug those that I feel that I have a connection with; good friends and family. To that end, I try too greet others, male or female, with a hand shake. Not an overly aggressive handshake where I am trying to squeeze their hands until I feel their knuckles pop. Just a standard neutral hand shake. There are major body language cues to shaking hands. Without going in to detail on how each is perceived by the recipient, I would just say that a neutral handshake is the best one that you can offer. Hold the handshake just long enough to make a mental note of what color the person’s eyes are. Any longer and you come off as creepy. Any less and you appear disinterested.

One other way is to just say “hello” to others. When I walk around a busy common place like a park or a plaza, I tend to make eye contact with those walking in the other direction. Again, this has to do with body language but also has to do with safety and confidence. When I do make eye contact with the other individual, I typically give them a hello. I do this regardless of what part of the country that I am in. One time I was on a consulting gig in San Jose, CA. I was walking through busy medical complexes with my client. Every office we walked into and even in the hallways, I was saying hello to others. My client finally expressed her anxiety. “You are going to get us killed,” she said. “People in this part of the county do not say ‘hi’ to one another if they do not know each other.” Honestly, I was shocked. We say “hello”, “hi,” or “howdy” to everyone in Texas. Do you know what I noticed from saying hello to others? They let their guard down for just a moment. A smile would come across their face. As if it was the first time that anyone had taken even a moment to show them any kindness. Some even opened up and started a dialogue with me. They wanted to know where I was from and what I was doing in California. As we would leave our brief conversations, they would tell me thank you for speaking to them. Not only was I being kind, but it was helping to spread just a little joy in the individual’s lives.

We are so open to these small acts of kindness here in Texas that you often see motorist waving to each other on two lane highways. Now this does not happen as often as it did in the past, but I am hoping to change that. I call it the “farmer’s wave.” I call it this because up until somewhere in the mid-2000s, it always seemed like it was a farmer in a pickup truck on a country road waving to you as you passed going the other direction. I for one am hoping to bring it back and I hope you will help me. Consider this: if you are driving down the road waving at people going the other way and you all of the sudden have car troubles, wouldn’t you like to know that someone stopped to help you because you waved to them an hour or two earlier. Kindness begets kindness. Kindness breeds trust. There is no law against kindness.

If you want to develop kindness, greet others with kindness.

My Mission as the Author of No Law

I want to help you do these two things:

• Live life intentionally
• Live a life of fulfillment

Living life intentionally sounds simple enough doesn’t it? Yet, so many of us are content to just allow the world to happen around us. We just sit back and watch others do things. We think that action should be taken, but taken by someone else. We wish someone would do something about all of this.

Well, the time is now. And the person that needs to do something is you. Are you truly fulfilled by just allowing the world to happen around you? Are you content with everything that you feel happens to you? There is a word for people that allow things to happen to them. It is called being a victim. I too, have dealt with the “victim” mentality lifestyle at some point in my life. “Why do these things always happen to me?” Things happen. They don’t happen to you. They don’t happen in spite of you or despite you. They just happen. I hope that reading this blog or picking up a copy of my book, No Law, will get you off of the sideline, and start living with intention.

Once you start living your life intentionally, you may notice that you start to feel more fulfilled. Fulfilled is when you feel as if you are living for the purpose that you were created. This is much different than happiness. Happiness doesn’t last. Fulfillment does. As things start to come together for you by living intentionally, your self-esteem will increase. Your self-confidence will increase. Your self-awareness will increase. A fulfilled life can provide all of this for you if you choose to live intentionally and embrace the principles listed in the book.

I hope this blog and/or the book challenges you in a way that you have never been challenged before. In the book you will find many stories from my life where I try to illustrate my points. Some of the things I share in the book, I have shared publicly before, but most of it has not. And to tell you the truth, I was a bit terrified to go public with some of the stories. But they are there for you. Thank you if you have picked up a copy of my book. I hope you enjoy it, and I hope it helps you to live the type of life that you want to live. In addition to reading the book, I hope that you will take the time to answer the questions at the end of each chapter. Do not feel that you have to address each one of the questions before moving on. I put them at the end of each chapter to give you guidance on how to make the changes you desire. If the goal is to live with intent, and have a more fulfilling life, then the No Law principles are the strategy, and the questions will serve as the tactics to get you there. These are quite specific and will help you identify areas of your life to improve, and give you guidance on what to do next. Education without application is a dull form of entertainment.

Please know that I am open to feedback and questions. Feel free to contact me via email at cdhawley@hotmail.com. Please use the words “No Law” in your subject line.

 

I look forward to you enjoying your new life. A fulfilling life lived with intent.

Time to Bond

I love spending time with my kids. Today, my son and I played catch. There is something about playing catch with your son. An experience unlike any other. Teaching something so fundamental to the game of baseball. I find it to be a fascinating exercise in observing confidence in action.

Whether it is playing catch with a baseball with your son, kicking a soccer ball with your daughter, or shooting baskets with either; I will always cherish the memories created. Personally and scientifically.

Get out and get active with someone, especially your kids. You will grow from it just as much as they will.